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Crying during Naptime

A common issue raised by daycare providers is that children in their care cry specifically during naptime. Some child care providers don’t know why the children are crying and how to handle it. When a child is crying during naptime it can be disruptive to other children at rest. . It can be both a frustrating and challenging part of the daycare job.  Some experts suggest that caregivers let the child cry it out while others oppose this method.

So, we interviewed Susan Cooper M.Ed., author of “Cooking by the Handful” and member of Applied Scholastics International, to find out why young children cry during naptime and what child care providers can do to alleviate the issue.

Own A Daycare: What are some reasons children cry during naptime in daycare?

Susan Cooper: Some of the reasons children cry during naptime are that they are genuinely tired, that the environment has changed so much and has caused them undue stress (example: too dark), that they are expecting certain activities or items and not getting them.  A tired child will usually nap without a problem.

Own A Daycare: How can daycare providers handle children who continuously cry during naptime? In other words, what strategies can they use to prevent or reduce this behavior?

Susan Cooper: The best way to handle children who continuously cry during naptime is to start with lunch.  Do not serve food that is high in sugar or caffeine.  Get the children outside for lots of play and exercise right before nap.  Gradually change the environment by setting out the cots, then setting the items out (blankets and books) and lastly turning off lights.  Put the children that cry the most in a more isolated area and put them on their cots first.  Try having them sleep on their stomach while gently rubbing their back.

Own A Daycare: How do daycare providers handle crying children when they continually disrupt the naptime of other children?

Susan Cooper: The best way is to have the child try napping in the office with the director to find out if the child will nap.  If the child is not a napper, explain that quiet play while staying on the cot is ok, such as reading a book. If the child can learn how to stay on the cot with quiet play, then he/she can return to the nap room.

Own A Daycare: Can you please provide some tips for daycare providers for discussing this subject with parents?

Susan Cooper: In California, a child cannot be forced to nap but can have quiet play while staying on a cot.  If parents understand this and what quiet play consists of, then parents should understand.  A parent who wants a full day of academics for their child needs to understand that children of 6 years and up are capable of that but younger ones need a quiet time.

Read More: How to handle crying during nap time.

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Autism is a huge issue that may affect many daycare providers or those that own childcare centers.  Diane Van Driesen, Director of Autism Services for the Wawa Eden House, clarifies autism spectrum disorder and describes special services for autistic children. Van Driesen also provides advice for parents of autistic children who are searching for child care and for daycare providers who care for autistic children.

OwnADaycare: What is autism? How and when is it diagnosed?

Van Driesen: Autism is a complex, lifelong developmental disability that affects a child’s ability to communicate, understand language, play, and relate to others.  Autism is considered a “spectrum disorder” meaning that its symptoms and behaviors can present itself in a variety of combinations from mild to severe.  Children with autism process and respond to information in unique ways.

Among the early signs and symptoms that parents and Pediatricians look for to alert them that a child needs further evaluation for autism include:

• Not smiling by six months of age
• Not babbling, pointing or using other gestures by 12 months
• Not using single words by age 16 months
• Not using two word phrases by 24 months
• Having a regression in development, with any loss of language or social skills

Infants with autism might also avoid eye contact, and as they get older, act as if they are unaware of when people come and go around them.

There are no medical tests for diagnosing autism, so an accurate diagnosis must be based on the observation of the individual’s communication, behavior and developmental levels.  Your child will need to be referred to someone who specializes in diagnosing autism spectrum disorders. This may be a developmental pediatrician, a psychiatrist or psychologist, and other professionals that are able to observe and test your child in specific areas.  Children may be referred for a diagnostic screening and/or evaluation at 18 months of age or younger.  Early detection and intervention is critical to the provision of specialized early intervention services.

OwnADaycare: Are there special programs/schools for autistic children and if so how are they different from “regular” programs?

Van Driesen Specialized preschool programs for children with autism tend to provide a specific method of treatment within a small, highly structured learning environment.  Because of the individual differences among children with autism, an individualized approach that addresses the core deficits of autism spectrum disorders (e.g., communication, social, sensory, academic difficulties) and that matches each family’s preferences and needs is recommended.  The following components have been identified as effect for children with autism:

• A curriculum that addresses deficit areas, focuses on long-term outcomes, and considers the developmental level of each child.
• Programs that capitalize on children’s natural tendency to respond to visual structure, routines, schedules, and predictability.
• A focus on generalization and maintenance of skills, using technology such as incidental teaching approaches.
• Effective and systematic instructional approaches.
• Coordinated transitions between service delivery agencies, including early intervention/preschool programs, and kindergarten environments.
• Use of technology associated with functional behavioral assessment and positive behavioral supports with a child who presents behavioral challenges.
• Family involvement, including coordination between home and involved professionals; an in-home training component; and family training and support.

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As children develop, they learn the skills to be polite, cooperative and helpful. Along the way, it is the duty of parents and daycare providers to encourage and support appropriate behaviors. Two childcare experts give excellent tips for reinforcing good behavior in toddlers.

Suzy Martyn, Parenting Consultant, Speaker, and author of Enjoy the Ride: Tools, Tips, and Inspiration for the Most Common Parenting Challenges provides the following suggestions:

1. Model the desired behavior. If a toddler sees the behavior naturally in a parent or teacher, they are much more apt to do it when directed so.
2. Encourage and affirm. It takes 7 positive statements to make up for a negative one so our children need to hear much more praise in order to accept any direction.
3. Intervene and guide earlier rather than later. Sometimes children can work out conflict or direct their own behavior in a positive manner but most of the time, they can benefit from an adult noticing early on when he/she needs some guidance, direction, and reminder in order to get them back on track before he/she gets too far off.
4. Read books, watch movies, and talk often about examples of good behavior.
5. Notice when someone is behaving well and comment about it. Make it something desirable to attain.
6. Start fresh after each conflict is resolved. Don’t bring up old mistakes or make children feel hopeless, criticized, or defeated.
7. Talk about your own experiences and how your good behavior brought about good things.

Zohra Sarwari, professional speaker, author, and home schooling mother of three, provides the following tips:

1. Sit with your child away from the fight, and ask questions.  Let your child answer the questions for you.  For example: When you toddler grabs a toy from someone else, ask him or her how they would feel if this happened to them?”  Give them a toy that belongs to you and ask them how would you like to give that back to me?  Should I grab it or ask you for it?
2. Make a chart for good deeds.  Every time they do a good deed check it on the chart.  Or put a sticker on the chart.
3. Explain to them how feelings work, and what makes us sad, and what makes us happy.  Ask them which feeling do they like most and which one do they not like?
4. Make sure that your toddler isn’t hungry or tired, and that is why they are acting out.  I always carry extra snacks, and make sure they take their nap, at nap time.
5. Always have many different activities available for your toddler.  An active mind is a happy mind.  I always make sure that I have books, puzzles, numbers, pencil and paper.
6. Ask them what is wrong?  Listen to them explain it to you, and then address the problem.  Many times as parents we jump to conclusions, and deal with a problem without knowing what the root problem is.  Take a few minutes, and find out what is really bothering your child.

Remember that no child is perfect and part and good behavior is a skill set that must developed. In the meantime, your best bet for dealing with behavior issues with toddlers in child care centers is to set clear boundaries, to be firm, calm when issues arise and always follow through. Consistency is the key. Then remember to emphasize and reinforce appropriate behaviors in order to encourage children on an appropriate behavioral path.

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